Dear Future Daughter,

photo credit: bissy photography

I played Mrs. Hudson in Sherlock Holmes.

During our drama performances I was running on very little sleep, was stressed and a little bit sick. That was rough. Overall the performances did go well and I enjoyed it.

“I don’t feel that great today, but I don’t really have time to be sick.” ←- quote of the year?

After performances were over I took the day off of my part-time job to go be a kid in the snow with siblings and some lifelong friends. One of the best days of my year.

There were at least two times this year where friendships weren’t quite how they should’ve been, either we never got along super well or we’d grown distant, God helped me fix those friendships. It’s amazing to me that the God who created the universe cares enough to help my friends and I get along.

A little over three months after robotics season started the team got to compete in a competition up in Sacramento. We stayed in the cutest farmhouses out in the country and spent time in the evenings chatting on the back porch. The competition was stressful, but also great. The girls in the room I slept in enjoyed some late night chats. We all came away from the competition closer and with lots of funny memories.

For a few months I had a job that seemed like a good idea, but eventually, I realized it was adding too much stress to my life. After doing it for the amount of time I committed to I decided not to continue. I struggled with that and prayed about it for a little bit before deciding. I didn’t want to give up just because it was difficult. In the end, I think it was good I recognized that it was too much while still trying to finish high school. Dear daughter, as you grow older you will come to more crossroads and decisions like this. Sometimes they’ll be hard. Pray about them and look to wise people in your life for advice.

There were many times throughout the year when I felt lonely even in big groups of people I knew. It made me think more about how I can have some amazing friends, but I can’t rely on them to always be there for me or fulfill my longings. Only God can do that. There were also really amazing times where I’d be at a concert or an event, glance around and see so many people I loved and was thankful for. I think maybe some of my reasons for feeling lonely at times was that I was being overly self-conscious about what people thought of me and making the event way too much about me instead of just enjoying being there and listening to people.

Around April I started dealing with a lot of fears I shouldn’t have had. I was worried about losing all my friends when I graduated, never getting to socialize since I’m not going to college and the fear that I’d be single for several more years. I feel like I tried to put this all in God’s hands several times, but then I’d take it right back and start worrying again. Now that I’ve graduated I know I’m not losing all of my friends. I’ve been able to stay in touch with a lot of homeschool group friends. I’m not around everyone as much as I used to be, but I’m content. As for not socializing, that didn’t happen. During work, I get to talk to and hang out with a lot of amazing people. Often when I’m not working I grab coffee with friends or pick a friend up and go to a random local event. Or just to the grocery store. I found a young adult Bible study group and joined it. It’s been a great way to take a break from work and chores and to meet new people. As for being single, yes I’m still single. But that’s ok. There’s so much I can do in this season of singleness and so many ways God can use me. Yeah, there are rough days, but overall, I don’t struggle with all of those fears as much as I used to.

Jealousy. Looking back on the year I’ve struggled with a lot of jealousy. Jealous that they’re closer than I am with them. Jealous that they got to do that and I didn’t. Jealous that he likes her and not me. All I know to do is pray for God’s help and to focus more on all the blessings He’s given me instead of coveting other people’s blessings. It’s also important for me to realize that I don’t deserve anything good. I’m a sinful human. Anything I have is extra, a blessing from God and all because of his grace. The comparison game is an awful trap.

English Contra Dancing

Senior banquet was a fun night. I went in with not too many expectations. I didn’t have a list of guys that just had to ask me to dance so my night would be made. I decided to just enjoy whatever did happen and I made a point of sitting with one of my long-time friends so I could experience it all with her and not just a group of aqcuaintances.

Avila Beach <3

A few days after that, I went on a beach trip with a few girlfriends. We took fun pictures, had good conversations and enjoyed some much-needed relaxation. Since then that group of friends and I have had several more fun, spontaneous adventures that often include singing along to music and photo shoots. Or trips to the grocery store.

Around May I started to notice that I was compromising and changing myself to be more accepted by everyone. I’d heard of people doing that, but I’d never felt the need or want to before. That really annoyed me and was something I prayed about. If you struggle with this same thing pray about it, talk to trusted people and try your best to stop. It’s never worth it. God created you exactly how he wants you to be and the people who are your real friends love you for who you are. Not for how cool, popular or even how much like them you are. You are unique and wonderful. Also, don’t compromise your moral standards to fit in.

On May 12th I was already a mess emotionally. It was like everything I was struggling with just hit me extra hard and I was stuck and wasn’t sure how to change how I was feeling. That night, after enjoying my robotics team’s banquet, I got the hardest news this year and maybe in my life. One of the seniors in my homeschool group that I’d grown a lot closer to over the past few months was hiking with friends and got swept away by a strong river current. I’d literally just seen him that morning and it was so hard to believe that that might’ve been my last time.

The socks I bought for my friend as a graduation present. I kept them. They remind me of him.

Two days later, while search and rescue teams were still out looking for him a large group of mostly teens met at his church to pray for him, his family and his friends who were hiking with him. As hard and emotional as it was, there was something so special about that night. The whole situation felt like something Satan might do to try and get us all to turn our backs on God. That’s not what happened. Instead, we all gathered together to pray earnestly and sing worship songs. We were reminded how short life can be and I know it moved some of us to try harder not to hold grudges against others. As awful as the whole week of not knowing where our friend was, I know people learned, through the news, about his family’s incredible faith even in one of the hardest situations imaginable. It wasn’t until almost a week after he disappeared that SAR found his body. Losing a friend hurt terribly, but it was comforting to personally know how strong his faith was and know without a doubt that he’s now in heaven with Jesus. I still get really sad, but I try to remember to thank God for the fact that I’ll see him again in heaven and for all the fun memories I had with him here on earth. Before this, I’d dealt with unexpected deaths of dear people, but never someone so close to my age.

"The Happiest Place on Earth"

Skip ahead a few weeks and I found myself headed to Disneyland for my first time ever. It was for my homeschool group’s senior trip. I got to know the incredible people in my group a lot better while waiting in line for rides. I’m excited to watch each of them adjust to adulthood and see how God uses them. I know it’s going to be amazing.

In June, we took a trip back to Lone Pine for my friend’s grad party. That was really special. I spent several years of my childhood in Lone Pine and now I’m working towards publishing a book series that takes place there (Dawn Chandler). Because of being connected to childhood friends through social media I was able to schedule get-togethers with lots of them during our short trip. I loved catching up with each of them and reminiscing about days long ago. Shortly after we got home, my Lone Pine friend, whose grad party we had just gone to, spent several days with us. We crammed the days with lots of fun little adventures and car sing-a-longs.

Around the beginning of July things slowed down and I started to get really sad again. It was almost as if in all the craziness I hadn’t had time to process the fact that my friend had died. I just wanted to be alone a lot of the time, which wasn’t normal for me.

One day two of my middle brothers let me hug them. That was a big enough highlight that it made it in my journal so I guess you should know too. Also, I discovered that typically if I sit on the floor in the living room my baby brother will crawl over to me and attack me with love. That’s one of the cutest things.

Whether they know it or not, these kids helped me.

Before I started volunteering with a kid’s summer program for my fourth year I wasn’t feeling the excitement I normally did. In the past, it’d been the highlight of my summers so I wasn’t sure what was going on. Even though I went into the program with the mindset of serving, in many ways, it was healing for me. I felt more joyful. I saw God work through all the volunteers. I felt like even if I couldn't see it clearly at the moment, I was helping make a difference. It was amazing.

Gift idea: Go to a dollar store and buy random things from every section along with a card that doesn’t really work for the person you’re buying it for (example: baby shower card for birthday)

My sisters presenting a homemade yellow graduation cap to me.

With homeschooling comes great flexibility...which means I didn’t finish school work and officially graduate until August. Leading up to graduation I stressed some about finishing schoolwork in time. In the last few days, I finally relaxed and started getting excited. Being the oldest I didn’t know what to expect for my ‘graduation ceremony’, but it turned out really nice. My dad talked about everything from him falling in love with my mom to how they decided what my school requirements would be. Many dear people came and it meant the world to me.

This bookstore and chatting with this author made me very happy.

I started September with a ten-day Oregon trip two of my grandparents took me on. It was such a special time and we made a lot of amazing memories. Seniors are basically teenagers, but with a lot more wisdom. If that makes any sense. Of course, going to Powells Bookstore and meeting the author Jill Williamson from Go Teen Writers was a big highlight.

In November, almost four years after completing my Dawn Chandler first draft, I sent it out to beta readers! That was such a great experience. In some ways, I’d gotten bored with my book, but their encouragement and excitement about it got me excited all over again! I have so much to fix in it now. My plan is to start another round of edits in January.

As you can see 2018 was basically an emotional roller coaster ride. Looking back, even the little things remind me of God’s goodness. I’m looking forward to my year of being nineteen. I have lots of hopes and dreams for it, but we’ll see what God’s plan is. Whatever it is, I’m certain it’s better than mine!

-Eliza Noel

Can you relate to any of my struggles? Tell me about your 2018!

1. Christmas Music

This is one of the number one things to get you in the right mood. There's quite the variety of Christmas music. Classic, Rock, Country, etc... Go check out Spotify's playlists! You can also look at the music highlights on my Instagram page for a list of top songs.

2. Christmas Movies

Hallmark. If you don't like Hallmark we can't be friends. Joking... kinda. Here are a few recommendations!
The Christmas Project
Cute, funny, family movie about a few brothers who have to do nice things for the school bullies.

Faith, mystery, drama, romance...guys, I love this series. Appropriate for all ages, but probably interesting for teens and older.

Elf
Although my parents aren't big fans of Santa Claus, we watch this every year. We like the Father-son story.

3. Christmas Books

Christmas Joy Ride
Joy, an eighty-five-year-old woman, sets out in her giant RV to travel Route 66 spreading Christmas cheer. But not for just anyone. She hand-picked six people who desperately need some cheering up. Miranda is Joy's middle-aged slightly pessimistic neighbor who is guilted into coming along. The trip ends up a wonderful blessing for her! Loved. It. Like so so so so much. This book definitely won a spot on my top favorites list. It almost made me cry and it warmed my heart. One of the most perfect fiction Christmas books ever written I'm sure. Will Hallmark pleeeeease make a movie version asap?

Others...
L.M. Montgomery Christmas Treasury
Cherry Ames Cruise Nurse
Hercule Poirot's Christmas
The Gift of the Magi

4. Spend quality time with loved ones.

• Go to the mall and grab some hot chocolate with a friend
• Walk around and look at Christmas lights 
• Go to a Christmas parade 
• Host a Christmas movie night
• Go see a local Christmas play or concert 
• Put away your electronics on Christmas day to focus on your family

5. Jesus IS the reason.
Not hot chocolate, not getting presents, not Mariah Carey's song and not even just that warm fuzzy feeling, but Jesus. This is a time to remember that God loved us so much He sent his son down to be with us. A time to remember all the miracles that have taken place. A time to thank God for all the blessings He graciously gives us. Christmas love songs and songs about Santa can be fun, but also listen to the carols telling of Jesus' birth. Let the whole story soak in and make you wonderstruck again. Cozy Christmas stories are nice, but also open up your Bible and read about the first Christmas. Hallmark is wonderful, but watch The Nativity Story to be reminded, once again.

How's your Christmas season going? Do you have any Christmas-y tips?

Here's a short Christmas story inspired by the song 'I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day'. I wrote it three years ago. Hope you enjoy ;)))

stocksnap

The snow made a crackling noise beneath his feet. He pulled his hood over his head and buried his hands deep down inside his pockets. This was the coldest day so far, this winter. Christmas time was quite evident. There were decorations and lights up in every storefront. He paused a moment to listen to a group of carolers.

“Peace on earth!” they sang. He scowled. A little boy’s eyes met his.

“Mawwy Chwismuth, Mithta!”

He grinned down at the boy then walked away. He wasn’t sure where he was going, he only knew he had to sort through his thoughts. When he came to a bench in a park he sat down. He buried his head in his hands.

A moment later, he heard someone walk through the snow then sit down at the other end of the bench. That was followed by a man coughing. A hand on the young man’s shoulder startled him and he looked up. He faced an old man with a cane, a worn out jacket and a jolly face. The older man stuck his hand out.

“The name’s Ed Turner. What’s yours?”

For a moment the young man just stared. He was momentarily confused by the elder man’s friendliness. He wearily shook Ed’s hand.

“Liam.” Ed gave him a questioning glance, “Liam Anderson.”

“Ah.” Ed sighed. He put both hands behind his head, leaned back and closed his eyes.

Silence. Liam was sure his new acquaintance had forgotten he was sitting there. He assumed the conversation had come to an end. He felt a little disappointed. Maybe he was lonely. Maybe he needed someone to talk to. Looking around the park he saw a young mother carrying a grocery bag and leading her little girl down the street. On the other side of the park was a man with a worn-out blanket wrapped around him pushing a cart in which his few belongings lay. Snow covered almost everything. He heard sirens in the distance.

“Tell me about yourself, Liam.” The young man jerked around to face Ed, once again. The older man continued, “Are you a college student? Do you work?”

Liam rubbed his hands together and sighed. "College student. I write for the newspaper on the side. It’s a hard job. I can hardly find any good news to write about. What about you? What do you do?”

Ed picked up a Bible that had been sitting on the bench beside him, “I just do whatever the good Lord asks me to.” He set the Bible back down, “Now tell me, Liam, how are you enjoying this glorious Christmas season?”

Liam grimaced, “Do you want the truth?”

Ed leaned back and closed his eyes, “An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips.”

Liam laughed for the first time that day.

Ed opened his eyes and turned towards Liam, “No, really. It’s in the Bible. Proverbs 24:26.”
Liam quieted his laughter down for a moment. “I figured so. But isn’t there a better way to word it? I don’t know…”

Ed smiled. “Now what did you want the wise men of the old days to say? An honest answer is like a fist bump? Or maybe, to receive an honest answer is like receiving a free Venti non-fat frappuccino with extra whipped cream and chocolate sauce? You tell me! You’re the writer.”

They both laughed. People walking past looked towards them curiously hoping to figure out what the joke was.

Once the laughter had dissipated Liam spoke, “Alright, then. The truth.” He sighed, “No. I’m not enjoying this Christmas season. In fact, I wish it would all be over already.”

Ed’s face showed surprise although Liam sensed he had already known somehow. “Why aren’t you enjoying it?”

A cloud partially covered the sun and it got colder.

Liam turned away for a moment. When he faced Ed again there were tears in his eyes and his voice was shaky. “It’s this time of year that people speak of peace on earth. What peace? I don’t see or feel it. People die every day because of acts of hatred. War, mass shootings, gang fights… many of the victims are innocent men, women, and children.”

Ed thought for a moment before he replied, “Humans are sinful. They turned away from God way back in the garden of Eden. Even now they continue to rebel against God’s commandments. Death and hatred are some of the consequences.” Ed put a hand on Liam’s back, “but that’s not the real thing that has you down this Christmas.”

It startled Liam since Ed had stated this as a fact although Liam wasn’t sure how he could have known.

Liam looked up at the sky and tried to hold back his tears. He didn’t face Ed but he began to speak. “if God loves us, why do people die of illnesses and diseases? Stuff like-” he took a deep breath and stuck his hands in his jacket pockets, “like cancer.”

“Liam.” Ed waited until the distraught young man turned to face him, “Let’s talk about your sister. Alice.”

Liam jumped up off the bench in surprise. “Who are you and what do you know about my sister?” He had raised his voice.

“Have a seat,” Ed said, calmly.

Not sure why he trusted this man, Liam sat back down.

Ed leaned in towards Liam. “I’m an angel.” He whispered then leaned back again.

Liam’s face went pale and he was silent in shock. Somehow, he felt it must be true.

Ed chuckled, “You do believe God sends angels down to earth, right?”

“Hebrews 13:2*,” Liam muttered. “That was one of Alice’s favorite Bible verses.” He turned towards the angel. Tears were freely flowing now. He sniffed. “She- she always dreamed of meeting an angel on earth.”

“Liam,” the angel said, “She did.”

“You mean, you?” Liam asked.

Ed chuckled again, “We had pleasant conversations on a couple of occasions. Once when she was a little girl, once when she was in the hospital. I didn’t let her know I was an angel while she was here on earth. She knows now. I could tell from the first time I met her when she was young that the most important part of her life to her, was her relationship with Jesus Christ.”

Liam bit his lip in an attempt to keep the flood of tears back. Flashbacks of Alice went through his mind. He thought of a time when Alice, him and their three other siblings had run through a field of flowers, laughing and yelling the whole time. He pictured her sweet innocent face framed by her wild and curly hair. She was sixteen then. It had been the fall after that his family found out she had thyroid cancer. About a year later, around Christmas time, she had gone to be with Jesus. It had been exactly a year since she left. Liam supposed that was why he was talking a walk in the heart of the city pondering all the bad things that happen in life on earth.

Liam had been staring off into space but now he turned back towards the angel.

“I still don’t understand why God would rip my precious little sister from my life.”

“After you just listed some of the terrible things that happen here on earth, wouldn’t you agree that Alice is happier now than she was here on earth?”

Liam nodded.

“Do you expect to see her again?”

Liam stuttered, “Yes.”

Ed continued, “Why do you have this hope of seeing Alice again?”

“Well…” Liam thought for a moment, “Because I know she trusted in Jesus and is in heaven now. As for me, I may have doubts but I know deep down inside that I do believe in God. I know I want to follow him.”

“There ya go!” Ed exclaimed and patted Liam on the back. “Alice and I will be at that blessed gate eager to meet you when you come.”

Although Liam was still sad, he smiled at that thought.

“Now tell me, Liam. If Jesus hadn’t come down on earth as a little baby boy then grown up and died on the cross for yours and Alice’s and everybody else’s sins, would you still have this hope of seeing Alice again? Would you have any hope of a wonderful eternal life?”

Liam shook his head, “No.”

“Now you see, terrible things may happen in this life, but if you believe in and trust Jesus Christ you can look forward to a joyful eternity. And that’s how, amidst the hatred, war, killing and terrible sicknesses, you can have peace in your heart while still on this earth. Peace on earth.”

Liam looked up at Ed, “Thank you.”

Ed smiled, “Don’t thank me. Thank the good Lord above who sent me.”

Liam smiled, there were still tears in his eyes.

“Now, I’m not saying it’s wrong to be sad. It’s okay to miss someone you dearly loved. Just remember, there is peace on earth for those who know they’re going to spend eternity in heaven.”
Ed got up from the bench and began to slowly hobble away with his cane.

“Merry Christmas, Liam!” He called over his shoulder, “Peace on earth.”

Liam replied, ‘Merry Christmas.”

The angel turned around, smiled, then vanished.


 *Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it. Hebrews 13:2

• My 16 y/o brother wrapping the cheese in orange tape. Somebody needs more useful things to do...

• Taking the 10 y/o bro on a bday date then him trying his best to annoy everyone at the nearby restaurant with his piano playing. "Yes!!! Already, six people left." Um, pretty sure they were just done with their food, but whatever. You go bro ;)

• Buying an insane amount of used books for a low price. Now I just need to catch up on review books so I can read them....
• A super chocolate-y cake for my mother's b-day!
• Going to a robotics competition the team I was on last year competed in.

• The present I bought my mom...she's been asking for it for years. 

• Going to a wedding and dancing with a group of friends.

• Getting a makeup tutorial from my friend, Macy! It definitely helped me know what to buy and develop my own everyday makeup process.

• Chai and walking around the mall chatting with one of my best friends. The escalator was also a highlight that evening.

Did I make you laugh? Or at least smile???

Tell me about your November!

Dear Future Daughter,
Our culture puts a lot of pressure and expectations on us young women. Especially when you get out of high school, there's the pressure to go to college and get a degree so you can start your career life. Don't get me wrong, I don't have anything against women going to college or getting jobs. Sometimes our culture makes it look like the only option. Sometimes it's hard to think beyond the plan that others have set before us, or to come up with new options.

I don't think it's wise to go to college just because 'that's what you're told to do'. As you approach this point in  life, spend lots of time in prayer asking God to guide your decisions. Think about what you want to be doing in five or ten years. If what you truly feel called to do is have a career that requires a college degree then start looking into college options and making plans. If you can get by just taking a few classes, maybe even online classes, to get better at whatever your passion is then do that. Look into trade school. I haven't done a lot of research, but if you know what you want to do it seems to be a good option. Now days, a lot of careers don't even require degrees.

Deciding not to go to college doesn't mean staying home reading all day (that does sound nice, though). No matter what you do, don't waste your time. If being a homemaker is your dream don't spend all your time searching for a husband so you can start homemaking. Start practicing now. Find ways to help your mom (oh hey, that's me 😏) out at home whether by cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, diaper changing or other things.

If you decide not to go to college there will probably be people who make you feel less than others because of your decision. Don't be discouraged. Focus more on being where God wants you to be and using your time the way God wants you to than following our culture's popular life plan.

I hope this letter encouraged you 💛

Love,
Eliza Noel (Mom)

photo cred//bissy photography

Dear Reader,
I'm so happy you've decided to stop by my new corner of the internet <3 As you read this, please picture yourself sitting with me, sipping iced coffee as we have a little chat (honestly though, we should do that for real sometime).

Whether you're one of my relatives, friends, internet friends or someone who just stumbled across this- you are the most important part of this blog. Blogging would be rather boring and pointless without readers. If we aren't already, I hope we become friends. I want to get to know you and your story. When you get a chance, leave a comment, shoot me a message over social media or use the 'contact me' form in the sidebar. If you'd like to get to know me better, there's a page for that right here.

Here's what to expect now that you're here...I'm a writer of happy stories with a passion to help other girls learn from my mistakes. I'm quite certain this blog will reflect that along with a sprinkling of music, book and movie recommendations and awkward moments from my life. If you're a tween or teen girl who enjoys reading, this is the place for you. If you're not, you're most certainly still welcome to stay. The choice is yours.

The latest thing happening in my writing world is that I'll be sending my book off to beta readers on November 1st!!! Go to this page if you'd like to be one.

Have a lovely day :)))

-Eliza Noel